[NetBehaviour] After the weekend.

[Ruth Catlow]

> sitting under the trees
on a hot summer day
the trees let me dream I live in Tuscany
> by the train track
> just outside the door
> worried about not speaking in the conversations that take place inside
never certain where to be or when to speak
> i really liked you
> and i really liked you
and i really liked you
> i ate coconut and ginger
cardamon and almonds,
Feral Trade sweets from Iran
Stories attached told under those same trees 2 weeks earlier.
> and smoked outside the door.
and i smoked your tobacco
> sitting under the trees
> by the train track
> just outside the door
> my friend brought me out three coffees, a small act of significance
all that coffee made my heart race
> what a long way a thought goes
> i drank my coffee
why did i drink enough to make my heart race?
> i smiled at my friend.
> sitting under the trees
> by the train track
> just outside the door
> i envied pink nails
> and good brains
> i smoked during the story of the mother smoking through cancer
> offered the teller a light
> lit up again.
> outside the door is a train track
> like a home long ago
> when I sat in a box room
> and played with a razor found in a reeking mothball drawer
> i cut myself
> just to see what it felt like
earlier
at an octagonal table
we talked about anger
but now i think it's really rage
that those with too much education, money
are so consistently inventive with their sadism and exploitation
> outside the door is a train track
> nobody seemed to notice the noise
only in the early hours
when the walls shake for 20 minutes as the clicking and rumbling 
approaches
thunders steel on steel steel on steel steel on steel
and then recedes like the weather
> so nor did i
> i listened to nomads
> with a detached longing
always on an infinitely stretchy piece of elastic
presence noted, felt
> wondered what the squatters thought of my view of a garden
> not a meeting of minds
> a meeting of moments
> like passing trains
> we left.
still presence noted, felt.

http://www.furtherfield.org/rcatlow/coffee.jpg
http://www.furtherfield.org/rcatlow/track_trees.jpg
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