[NetBehaviour] Flaming Post Alert

paul.annear at gmail.com paul.annear at gmail.com
Tue Jun 14 06:56:55 CEST 2005

My most humble obeisance to all sentient beings, and I am liberal
enough to include the hominids, who may have been offended by the poor
humour of the kiwi.  An insouciant creature known in these parts as a
bird that eats roots and leaves.  A bird of the night on the verge of

May I suggest that a rational analysis of the situation would throw
into the mix the possibility that the contributions objected to are
not flaming or 'ad-hom' attacks ... but rather that it might seem to
the disinterested observer from some other autophagic star system that
the violently erratic and paranoid responses have some characteristics
that are scarily sociopathic.

Let me say unequivocally that I LOVE the idea of '... a month on
flamers and general ad-hom attacks. Basically covering the art of
attacks and such. Paul Annears [sic] is a recent example, although
there are much better artists out there for this'.

('Out there' used to have a certain cachet amongst the stoner classes
but its present mass usage reminds me of the time - was it the late
seventies? - when with a bewildering suddenness every traffic cop in
New Zealand had the same moustache.)

I would like to emphasize that The Paul Annears are in at least
temporary abeyance and in some disarray due to a recent series of
inappropriate grandstanding incidents - some would call them flaming
attacks - by a renegade faction of The Paul Annears who embarrassingly
don't even understand what flaming is.  As the matter is sub judice I
won't mention any names.

One of The Paul Annears - this one - feels that the situation has gone
way beyond a joke and has stepped in in a hopefully unfutile attempt
to restore the high esteem formerly enjoyed by this multi-personality
self-regarding web-monster.  This one of the The Paul Annears prefers
to apply herhimself hermaphroditically to The Concise Model of the
Universe, among other projects (and do please keep an eye open for

I, if I may be for a moment be so egocentric, would be very pleased to
see this event of universal appeal ('... a month of flaming and
general attacks via e-mail etc....') on any list that encourages
mind-numbingly pseudo-intelligent comment and body-piercing
eye-watering observation, along with unmediated and excessive
self-flagellation. It would have to be an open list, I think.  Those
with fragile unegos are safer on moderated lists.

Unfortunately it has been my observation over a number of years that
there is a strong tendency to carpet-chewing mouth-frothing
Schicklgruberian tantrums in the ranks of unselfregarding people who
feel that their unlist, or their uncontribution, or their unego is
under attack, but that is totally understandable and if somebody
attacked me in such an amusing way I wouldn't find it at all funny

Finally, and in a blaze of photoshoped new sunrise, an open invitation
to all freedom-loving web-ers, to contribute to the (unmoderated)
zeitgeist.  Visit The Concise Model of the Universe (www.xxos.net if
you didn't know that already), enable pop-ups because as The Model is
concise it all fits in one elastic window, click on the look-at-me red
'+' symbol on the site tool bars, take a moment to register (so you
can get back in easily later - no credit card required) and add your
own peculiar understanding of what is going on to what is going on.

I look forward to your contributions be they flaming, frigid, fecund,
flaccid, flatulent, funny, formicatious, or (to introduce you to a
Maori word) whatever.

A Paul Annear

Paul Annear

12 June 2005 6:28 PM
My Dearest Paul,

Your creative flame inspired the pasted text below.

One version of where things go.

Wait. Wait until the last car leaves with the train.
Rain handles itself, the old woman will say, an
umbrella types and casts a reel. Calling from a booth
in a field filled with water are the people you want
to avoid. They might appear to be fishing. But look
closely at their line and hook, their brief sequence
of notes drawing your ear, and you will find them
checking pockets for change. Stare the tracks down for
crushed quarters. Hold the soaked ties in one hand and
pull up on the rails. Fire makes things straight, the
old woman will say, resined wood begins where
everything begins. You will strain, recalling random
seconds of past straining. And when you become worn
and the ties sink into gravel, you should consider
polishing your speech. Make the words appear as chairs
or plush toys. Make each sentence repeat the structure
of the first. Still your vibrating cords and collect
rainwater in a mug that reads "World's Greatest
Suspension Bridge." But before you speak, before you
take all of this far too far away, huddle with the
superstars, those famous sounding names, stacked in
feuding groups of eight or five. They won't offer much
warmth or soft places to fondle, but the station has
closed, you've lost your wallet and the wise old woman
wears her shawl like an iron gate.

13 June 2005 11:39 PM

Kiwi Paulie,

Aside from being ignorant of what flame means in this context, you should
look into the work of gabriel gudding and other humorists, and
roasters. Although you do attempt to capture and perfect the
ad-hominem attack, that vague glancing whatever, you are too reliant
on non specifics.  Just merely saying "calls himself a poet" isnt
really a specific enough. So  find some of my poetry.

In fact  I have a poem coming out in the next issue of Meanjin, you
know one of our regional (I'm in Australia) journals. Actually support
poetry by purchasing a literary journal, and then read the poem. Then
I suppose you can critique and flame out on it.

Or check out this project:


Read the George Bush poems under political speeches or the other
works..(matrix is the works of the bunch) and please comment.

Then please do send some of your poetry along. Please. I looked at
your site, but found nothing that resembles poetry. So....

If you have such an amazing understanding of poetry I would love to
bring you over to Australia to one of the festivals I help organize.

cheers, Jason

13 June 2005 11:45 PM

I've been asked to be one of the moderators for the Empyre list
starting soon. And I was thinking of having a month of flaming and
general attacks via e-mail etc.... Perhaps you would have some
thoughts on who to get involved.


13 June, 2005 11:49 PM

I've been asked to be a moderator on the Empyre list
and I was thinking of having a month on flamers and
general ad-hom attacks. Basically covering the art of
attacks and such. Paul Annears is a recent example,
although there are much better artists out there for
this. Does anyone recall who that was who did this on
the poetics list and was removed? Or how about the
webartery kid who was removed for some vague personal


14 June 2005 12:32 AM

Just wanted to offer a truce. To be honest with you I
found your posts amusing. I honestly dont think you
have read any of my work, or it seems much. And now I
realize that you have been banned from at least one
list (empyre) and maybe others. So, why not attempt to
make some real contacts and play a bit. Perhaps
something for the residency. Or you can continue
blasting away. Either way.


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