[NetBehaviour] My greatest fears second part plus a vision

Alan Sondheim sondheim at panix.com
Sun Nov 30 06:37:06 CET 2008

My greatest fears second part plus a vision

That we will remain unemployed.
That we will become homeless.
That we will huddle screaming in the dark.
That I will not be able to help Azure, so much darkness surrounds me.
That Azure will tire of my despair, depression, regrets, insomnia, age,
obsessiveness, irritability, illness, hysteria, exhaustion.
That I will become a burden to Azure.
That I will be withdrawn from working online as my equipment fails and I
cannot replace it.
That we will not be able to afford healthcare.**
That I will helplessly witness my own desecration.**
That I will die in pain.**

But then there are visions, from today, New Mexico:


Of which I have not seen before, small miracles (harboring (despair),
nonetheless, small miracles.

**A friend of mine lay in his own filth in a hospital bed, screaming in
pain, before he was taken to a hospice to die.

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