[NetBehaviour] my damned fingers / slave to repetition / bad habits /

Alan Sondheim sondheim at panix.com
Sat May 26 01:15:31 CEST 2018

my damned fingers / slave to repetition / bad habits /

my fingers have their own way, not independent but the usual
trite dances, c, c#, d, d#, e, f, blah blah blah, my right hand
doing this moronic dance on the lower echelons of the clarinet,
my left hand bungling the upper echelons on just about any
string instrument.* i hate the dreams of them, my damned
fingers, useless thumb, sometimes it reaches over the neck or
jumps one way or another (this left thumb of mine), i work all
of this over and over again for no purpose at all, the talent
was never there, i practice uselessly like having extra limbs
that don't reach the ground. we almost never play out, we're
never on call, i play for myself like that moronic solitaire i
must have mentioned above or not at all, the letters keep
shifting around like my fingers try but fail to do something
like that. did i say our albums sell zero, we get no royalties,
we give them away, sometimes you might give an album in return
which is always neat.* but the fingers, it goes back to that.
oh, and the breath as well, puff puff puff. the fingers, one two
three, three two one. the breath, in, out, in out, like moving
furniture cartons around a warehouse door, there are trucks
around, loading and unloading, i'm getting out of breath just
thinking about it. puff puff puff 123 321 123 321 or just the
exchange 12 21 12 21 or 13 31 13 31 or 23 32 23 32 or puff ffup
puff ffup puff ffup blah blah blah. "my fingers have their own
way, not independent but the usual trite dances" with the usual
stale music, pretty much dead, i'll give up, i'll do the dead
thing, http://www.alansondheim.org/cc.mp3 clarinet
http://www.alansondheim.org/bb.mp3 clarinet
http://www.alansondheim.org/clari.jpg , i can stand in a room
and pretend there's an audience, there's even fingers, there's
even fingers moving, can't even get the grammar right, is there
such a thing as grammar (beyond the usual trite dances???)** --


*logical conclusion, that our music is bad.

1234 puff puff puff
bandcamp coming soon


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