[NetBehaviour] The thought of menhaden

Alan Sondheim sondheim at panix.com
Fri Sep 20 01:03:53 CEST 2019



The thought of menhaden

http://www.alansondheim.org/menhaden0.jpg
http://www.alansondheim.org/menhaden1.jpg
http://www.alansondheim.org/menhaden2.jpg
http://www.alansondheim.org/menhaden3.jpg

of their presence or absence, of their place, their world, their
biome, of their proximity, of their urgency, their thought, of
their sadness or exaltation, of their coming forth and their going
forth, of their passing, of their being, of among them, seeing and
hearing, movement of water, within and without the tide, of their
listening and comfort, of the water passing, the comfort of water,
their being, plural and singular, solitary and communal -

The picture or thing doesn't fall apart, _it's corrupted,_ speaks
inexactly, the level is rising inexorably. In the industrialized
countries, aging will insure, inexorably in cost; the gap between
black and white inexorably driven by forces of damping effect;
later, water, we'd drowned as if making lists, but to a wrong
address I inadvertently entered in one or another spreadsheet, you
know how it is, and the presence never answered. Voices are often
muffled, almost inaudible, a lot vision even if nothing "comes
inadvertently." We learn to expect things. We read, we swim against
the stream. Has the writing been lost? They do everything to
encourage that. When we're hurt we withdraw, because things are
triggering everything in sight - now again, inadvertently, we
remain outside the walls. We look up, the walls. My voice engages
the space which shares the same acoustics of what might have been
heard, had they been listening. Mindfully, mind you, all those
exercises we tried, we heeded, through ignorance. There were only
the inelegant solutions of passing on, passing by. Angela, by the
way, came by, and complained about them (the spreadsheets). My
voice engaged her, we shared the same sonorous space, it was
glorious. We made do - this is all we have achieved, yes, again, it
was glorious, inelegant, but glorious, however clumsy or doubtful.
Incontrovertibly, we wanted this!!! That sounds like, still sounds
like, the truth. The better it was, the worse; the worse it was,
the better, we settled for the latter. I realize this is all
indescribably inelegant, and gloriously (that word again)
inexact...




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