Hi Edward,

I think "we" have a primitive instinct, perhaps, to think things through, almost a form of prayer.
As if speaking the unspeakable is curative, tends toward cure. I'm also debilitated, in a way,
by not being able to let go, as if I'm haunted by holocausts, as if the worst in people, on a
massive scale, somehow defines us. It's so easy in a sense for violence, on a large scale,
to occur. Maybe the good and creative things in my life are tied to these thoughts, I don't
know. I write to try to write out of them, certainly, perhaps a form of saying Kaddish. I
certainly don't want to bring anyone down; I think the music, for example, that I've been
putting up, at least for me, is a form of aspiration towards healing, just as a funeral is also
a gateway perhaps.

It does come down to the roots of prayer, to the idea of language itself as performative.
And there can be a beauty in that, as there is in the Kaddish (written in Aramaic, not
Hebrew), that is somewhat healing -

(Btw looked up Patel - oh my God! (another prayer!) :-) )

Thank you! Best, Alan -

On Sun, Mar 13, 2022 at 11:32 AM Edward Picot <edward@edwardpicot.com> wrote:

It's good to see you responding to this stuff in the Ukraine, and I
think you're probably echoing a lot of the things the rest of us are
thinking and feeling. There's a sense of helplessness when we look, and
a sense of guilt when we turn our eyes away and focus on anything else
for a while. There's a feeling that we ought to be constantly thinking
about it and talking about it, but also a sense, as you say, that to do
so is merely self-serving, because it doesn't actually achieve anything
except striking an appropriate posture.

I think we do have to try to find adequate responses if we can, but we
also have to carry on with/reaffirm the good and creative things in our

Today my son mentioned to me that he thought things must be improving in
the Ukraine, because it didn't seem to be in the news so much. And
that's part of our problem in the West: if it's not a headline, we think
the problem must have gone away. That's part of the reason why we find
it so difficult to deal with environmental issues.

What I find particularly distressing is that our Western politicians are
following the same populist behaviour-patterns as Putin - claiming to be
doing one thing, while actually doing something completely different.
I'm thinking of Priti Patel and her behaviour towards Ukrainian refugees.


On 3/13/22 3:54 AM, Alan Sondheim via NetBehaviour wrote:
> selfish truths dead music
> video (audio) https://youtu.be/oLGWkWFC_bA
> http://www.alansondheim.org/loss.jpg
> st
> wartime - anything i say is self-serving
> it's inconceivable we cannot annihilate the ego
> all the world says me me me and says useless
> the world is iron yes. iron survives
> terror of rust dirty bombs sinter
> luxury of surviving despair intact bones
> luxury of speaking yes it's luxury
> annihilation to the limit at a distance breathe
> people trying to get out i sit here look look look
> people on television playing football no sound now
> i turn down sound look i think to myself look
> 2 friends to each other - shut up no one wants
> to listen to you anyway - speaking is no longer
> performative - i embarrass myself - everything here
> - a luxury - this instrument - this equipment -
> what survives - within a decade i'll most likely
> be dead - statistics - war on screens - sounds -
> hating the sound of voices - continuations -
> continuums - incendiary bombs contribute to global
> warming - self hatreds blossom like bombs -
> another luxury - answer phones - field calls -
> the them - us - we - me - latest news - give -
> donations don't stop bombs - suffer the guilty -
> first ones to call innocent - broken birds -
> plants - you understand me i don't understand me
> at all - the me closes in on itself - a particle
> - no bombardment - sky is our closest enemy -
> save yourself - eliminate the i - this will not
> end well they say - this will not end well - this
> will not end at all -
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> NetBehaviour mailing list
> NetBehaviour@lists.netbehaviour.org
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